Why come to relationship counselling?

Relationships can bring out ‘the very best’ and ‘very worst’ in each of us.  If the individual within the couple is relatively content and happy within themselves, they are more likely to be ‘working together’ within the relationship.  Hence, they are more likely to be enjoying a satisfying and fulfilling partnership.

At times like these a couple may seek professional guidance in an effort to:

• Provide clarity around both the conscious and unconscious expectations of each other and hence provide a better understanding around the underlying reasons for persistent conflict, miscommunication, misunderstandings and disappointment.          
• Provide insight, understanding and management of patterns and reactions within the relationship such as, blaming, disengaging, withdrawing, resentful compliance, denial and/or confusion.          
• Understand, improve or even ‘revive’ emotional and sexual intimacy within the relationship.          
• Understand the potentially damaging effect of early, childhood traumas in an individual’s past and how the pain of such trauma can repeat and reiterate within the relationship.  In some cases it may be advised that individual therapy be considered as an adjunct to couple’s therapy.  It is essential to understand and heal from such painful early experience in order to reduce the tendency for the past to unavoidably and sometimes unintentionally, encroach upon the present.          
• Provide clarity and understanding around whether or not the relationship should stay together with, or without having shared a long history, the joint responsibilities of children, property or assets.  In cases where a couple may choose to end a marriage or partnership, couple’s therapy provides guidance and support through the often painful process of separation and inevitable grief.  This is essential in order to provide a clearer pathway to recovery, emotional re-building and eventual happiness.

It isn’t possible to create a fulfilling, contented relationship by ‘simply fixing what’s wrong’ but at least, it’s a start.  In order to create a long-lasting and sustained improvement in your relationship you will need to consider and sometimes, reconsider the picture of the life you want to build both together and individually.  You may also need to examine your current beliefs so as to develop appropriate attitudes and communication skills in an effort to work as part of a team.

As the case with individual therapy, the ‘success of the process’ is largely governed and dependent upon your own personal commitment to the process, your motivation to persist and time.  Time is required not only in order to understand yourself, your partner and review progress, but also necessary before any meaningful, lasting change can occur.

Your ‘total investment’ in the process is arguably one of the most important decisions you will ever make, often forcing other ‘investment choices’ to pale into insignificance when put into proper perspective.

In essence, the aim of couple’s therapy is to increase knowledge of yourself, your partner and the afflictive patterns of interaction between you.  Therapy becomes effective as you apply new knowledge and healing to the process of breaking old, ineffective patterns and facilitates the development of better ones.

Please phone 9228 1527, email info@tlsc.com.au or click HERE

Consultations are available via Skype, Zoom, FaceTime and telephone.